I went to a karaoke birthday party for someone at the IO last week. I signed up to sing “Don’t You Forget About Me.” Not a great song, but a song I love, as I love The Breakfast Club. There was a huge backlog of people waiting to sing, and I ended up leaving before I got my shot.

As a result, the song has been stuck in my head all week.

I may have mentioned this in an earlier entry, but I once tried to count all of the “la’s” in that song. I was unsuccessful.

It did teach me a lesson about life, however. It’s one of those lessons that you can’t learn in school, one that no one bothers to teach you. Much like learning not to sneeze while standing in a doorway (forehead trauma) or to be careful while vacuuming near a propped up box spring (again, forehead), this is wisdom that can only be gleaned through the anecdotes of others.

Apparently, I am unable to urinate while singing.

“Why am I not peeing?” I asked myself. Clearly, I had to pee, as I was standing in the bathroom before the toilet, not something I usually do without purpose. Confused, my warbling stopped, and the urinating began.

“Ah,” I thought. “I must share this with The People.”

And now you know. Go forth. If you can pee while singing, you are more evolved than I.

Elvis has shit in the building.

There’s a dog that roams our production office. His name is Elvis, and he has a tendency to get nervous. In the midst of a minor freak out, Elvis left our staff a six foot long trail of Dog Gift near our meeting room.

I never thought I would hear anyone shout the phrase “Elvis! ELVIS! NO! NO!”

I also didn’t think I would spend most of this entry discussing human and animal bodily functions.

A large number of paper towels were applied. Elvis was chastised. He trotted off wagging his tail.

My officemates spent part of their morning watching The Simpsons. The girl I’m dating seems pretty damn adamant about not getting back with her ex. It’s cold, rainy, and overcast in Los Angeles today. Bagels are plentiful, the coffee hot, and the emails and IMs are flowing freely as I do my work.

Not bad. Good mood. Let’s eat.