OK, this has just become ridiculous and sad. I�d be angry enough to vomit if he just weren�t so much of an idiot.

And the rest of you people: Man, I feel villified! It�s as if I�ve suddenly become the Diaryland Hitler just because I don�t call my roommate just to inform him of every trivial detail of my life. I�m having a coke right now. Apparently, according to my guestbook, I should issue a press release.

The hate is almost overwhelming. I mean, I know that most of you think of me as witty and tall and cute, so why you would turn against me, a Diarylander who so many people list as a favorite, a guy who is arguably one of the best writers working here (if not THE best), why you would suddenly become my enemy is beyond me. I check my stats every few minutes and I don�t like what I see.

The sick thing is that Jonny didn�t even bother to get the facts from me before he launched a disgustingly vicious personal attack on me in his gay little diary. I mean, you would think that he�d at least want to know what the real deal was before he let loose with all that stuff. Granted, he did call me before he wrote that entry, but I was eating dinner, and it�s not like I was about to be so rude as to answer my cell phone right there at the table. I meant to get back to him, but I guess I just forgot.

Oh well. I�m sorry. I�m, as he says, just plain �evil.�

Besides, it�s not like I was never going to talk to him. I have enough sense to know that I should have. Hell, I was going to do a lot of nice things. For example, my share of the rent on our place is $550 a month. I was totally going to kick him $75, maybe $100 a month until he found a new roommate. I figured that was fair, as it was better than nothing and I really wasn�t living there anyway. Besides, I�d let him sell my mattress and dresser, and I know that they would bring in at least $150 or so together. But now, because he�s handled this like a complete jerk, I don�t think I should even do that.

And I�m the evil one?

Thanks, guys.

And thanks for siding with someone whose sole purpose in life these past few months has been to make me feel as bad as I possibly can. I never really talked about it, because I�m a cool guy and I consider myself someone who treats their friends right, but as long as the cat�s out of the bag� I remember one time, a few weeks ago. It was after I was fired and I was feeling pretty low. I was going through some stuff with Sally, depressed about losing my job, couldn�t figure out what to do next in this game I was playing, and I hadn�t left the apartment in three days except to take out the garbage once.

That�s a whole other story, by the way. Just because I didn�t have a job he expected me to do EVERYTHING around the house. And I�m the selfish one here.

Anyway, I�m in my room with the lights off and the door closed. Pretty clear sign (I thought) that I didn�t want to talk to anyone. He comes home, knocks on my door, and opens it slightly. He�s all like �Hey, man. You OK? You seem pretty bummed lately, wanna talk?�

Jesus, that just pissed me off. I mean, where does he get off, butting his nose into my business? He didn�t say it, but I knew what he was implying: �My life is so much better than yours and I am so together and cool so I can act like your big (fat) brother and help poor little Bill.�

It just made me sick. I didn�t talk to him for days, so I think he got the message.

Then there�s the way he�s always insisting on lending me money. That always made me feel REAL good. �Hey, Bill, I make so much money that it�s no problem for me to give you $300 just to make sure they don�t boot your car.� Classy.

To address his latest entry: Sure, there have been women. I�m unemployed at the moment and going through some personal crises�what else is there to do? But I know why he mentioned it. He�s always been jealous because my entire fucking love life doesn�t take place online.

Sorry, I guess I�m a bad guy because I�d actually prefer to meet real women than seduce every 17 year old that leaves me a guestbook entry.

Like he should talk, anyway: If anyone would like to see some interesting video, why not go to Kazaa and look up the files under the username Jonny_Zero_Salinger? There�s tons of fun stuff for the whole family, like �15 year old sux first cock,� �Mother wakes to rape son,� and �Asian boy facial.�

He really should have found some way to keep me from looking through his computer files while he was at work.

I�m really getting sick of this whole thing. He has been selfish and immature throughout this whole ordeal. I don�t appreciate the threats, either.

Jonny, if you want to know what�s going to happen if this keeps up, here�s a hint: You know your precious �War of the Worlds� and �Man in the Moon� DVDs you lent me? You know how you love them so and were so reluctant to trust me with them?

Two words: Beverage. Coasters.

Keep it up, dick.