Well, well, well�look who it is. If it isn�t little Billy Fadein, back from the dead.

To what do we owe the honor, Mr. No Updatey McGee?

And who the hell am I talking to? Or as?

Yes, I�ve been away for a while. Five updates from me in February. Maybe two or three that actually counted. What has it taken to bring me back?

No, it isn�t the Oscars. It wouldn't be adding anything new to say that they were incredibly boring this year. I do wish Bill Murray would have won, even though his performance in Lost in Translation didn�t really deserve an Oscar. It just would have been great to see a SNL alum finally win.

I suppose I�ll just have to be the first.

And it wasn�t APP (Amy Poehler�s Panties) that brought me back. My roommate does a thorough re-telling of the event, replete with his brush with death. I wasn�t anywhere near being brought to heaven, despite the fact that I spied and enjoyed the rosy pink hue of the TV star�s undergarments as she leaned over in front of me, railing against gay marriage, overenthusiastic pachyderms, and whatever else I was laughing too hard to catch.

No, I suppose that if there is a good reason I�ve been gone a while, it�s because I just haven�t felt much like myself lately. Outside of my job, I�ve been avoiding doing any actual work on the things in my life that should be important to me. I came out here and subjected myself to Los Angeles because I wanted to advance in the show business. Instead, if I�m not laying around reading I�m laying around wasting time playing games or other nonsense.

I�m sick of that.

I hate making huge proclamations, because they can be so hard to live up to, but I can say that I�m beginning to realize that it�s time that I made the fact that I�ve sacrificed Chicago (I promise you right now, I will never, never title a movie �Sacrificing Chicago�) mean something.

In short, I�ve gotta stop fucking around.

Which should be a lot easier come March 19th, my last day on the job here. In addition to more time to write, museums will be visited, trails will be hiked, jogs will be jogged and sun will be soaked, I tell you what.

Due to my lack of updates, anecdotes lost to the hazy fog of history include:

The Great Tire Blowout in the Pouring Rain of Last Week

�What Smells Like Ham?� The Saturday I Cleaned Out My Car

The DMV Tries To Take My License Away, Then Says It Made a Mistake, and I Hate Them

The Day My Hands Got So Dry My Knuckle Actually Cracked Open and Bled, But Only a Little