FROM: John Calley, Chairman Sony Pictures Entertainment

TO: Jim Friedman, Chief of Development Columbia Pictures(Subsidiary)

Jim-

I just got a flash. We need a movie with lots of flying jump kicks. There should be girls in it too, I think. Any screenplays down there look good?

John

FROM: Jim Friedman, Chief of Development Columbia Pictures(Subsidiary)

TO: John Calley, Chairman Sony Pictures Entertainment

John-

Interesting. You always were a genius, boss. Flying jump kicks and girls, that's a great idea. It's like a perfect combination of, oh, I don't know...kicks and girls.

Anyway, we do have some things. We're talking to Lori Petti about a script called 'Flying Jump Kick Sluts.' It's kind of a movie about girls that are sluts that can jump kick. We also have a script were considering called 'Three Really Hot Chicks Who Can Jump Through the Air Performing Impossible Flying Jump Kicks While the Camera Rotates Around them Like Matrix.'

Either of those sound good to you?

Jim

FROM: JOHN

TO: JIM

I like the second script, which I will refer to as 'TRHCWCJTTAPIFJKWTCRATLM.' Lori Petti is out. We need someone bigger. I rescued Drew Barrymore from OD'ing at a party last month. She still owes me a favor. We'll get her to dip into her inheritance, produce it, and save some cash. Send me a copy of the script. I want to make sure there are enough flying jump kicks. Also, if you can put the girls in bikinis and have them shake their asses a few times, that will really help box office. Oh, and since I said that I will refer to 'TRHCWCJTTAPIFJKWTCRATLM' as 'TRHCWCJTTAPIFJKWTCRATLM,' please allow me to make good on the fact that I said that: 'TRHCWCJTTAPIFJKWTCRATLM.'

John

FROM: Jim

TO: John

You've done it again, you genius. I've now added a 'tit and/or ass' scene every five pages, and increased the amount of flying jump kicks by 24%. Oh, I think we should probably sign on Cameron Diaz to do most of the ass shaking; it'll look great on TV spots.

Jim

P.S.: I fucked her

FROM: John

TO: Jim

Me too. Idea: Call the movie "Charlie's Angels," and we'll capitalize on the retro craze. Besides, it's catchier than 'Three Really Hot Chicks Who Can Jump Through the Air Performing Impossible Flying Jump Kicks While the Camera Rotates Around them Like Matrix.'

Thanks, Jim. You're doing good work, here. From the billions that the studio and I make on this picture (rentals, overseas distributions, broadcast rights, etc.) I'll be sure to throw you a little crumb for your contribution in deafening the American people to any work with real artistic merit.

John

FROM: Jim

TO: John

Thank you, sir! The wife and I are having people over this weekend. Try to stop by.