What I learned on Independence Day:

If you're just laying there minding your own business, your girlfriend, clad only in pink panties, will leap atop you and begin to shrilly scream "I'm going to sit on your face!" You, content to just lay there, and not much in the mood for this sort of thing anyway, will begin to laugh and say "No!" Giggling, she will reply "Yes, I will!" This continues for several minutes. Finally, just to break the monotony, you say "Fine, do it." It is at that point, when her guard is down, that you grab her legs, push her down, and begin to shout "Wheelbarrow! Wheelbarrow!" as she crawls on her hands across the room. At the end, she will begin to protest, saying "I'm not strong enough! Nooooooo!"

It is only then that you can go back to laying down!

Happy 4th, Americans!