My roommate does not appreciate being repeatedly slapped in the face with a slightly damp paper towel.

No, he does not, and the empty glass of mine that once held ice water is proof enough of that.

Today:

I am wondering: How the customer service agent I just spoke to on the telephone, who could barely articulate a simple concept to me and has apparently only heard of the English language from her pals at work, has a job and I don't.

I am feeling my urge to kill: Rising.

I am getting: A haircut and a plan.